A Canadian Perspective on Access to OCD Treatment

Melanie Lefebvre

Melanie Lefebvre

I’m a Canadian living with OCD in a city of just over 150 000. As a Canadian, I have access to free health care, but having OCD means, ideally, access to specialized care. Specialized care can be hard to find. And often, when (or if) you find it, it ain’t cheap.

Let’s reflect back on the 80’s in Canada for a moment. As a child, I wouldn’t allow my mom to use the stove. Perplexed, she asked a public health nurse for guidance:

“Make sandwiches.”

So my mom made sandwiches.

A rare window into the psyche of a child had been revealed: an opportunity missed.

Based on my personal experience searching for specialized help for OCD, it’s likely these opportunities may continue to be overlooked. I can’t speak for other cities across the Great White North. But I would hope that metropolitans like Toronto have more options.

Speaking of options from my experience, here’s the first for review:

Option 1: Counselling (for a fee)

As a young woman in my early twenties, I recognized I needed help. I displayed signs of hit-and-run OCD, but other than that, I only knew the typecast of OCD: checking, hand washing and having things in order.

With time, I learned that my city has counselling agencies with sliding scales for payment based on one’s level of income. Through my career, I learned that if you’re receiving government assistance, the price goes down substantially and can be affordable at around $10 a session.

Option 2: Counselling (Free)

If you’re on social assistance, the government allots you a time limited amount of free counselling sessions. But let’s say you’re not on social assistance. Well, there are still options. We have a couple of short-term counselling agencies for people with limited income free of charge, one of which is specific to the French-speaking population.

If you’re employed with the luxury of an Employee Assistance Program, you’ve got a batch of time-limited sessions of counselling for free.

The catch to counselling? You’re not necessarily going to find an OCD specialist.

That’s what happened with me. The counsellors I’ve had throughout the years, through various means, reassured me countless times, doing more harm than good.

Option 3: Psychologists

If you have benefits through work, your parents, or your spouse, you may get a nice chunk of psychologist fees covered. Otherwise, fees range from $125 to $200.

I’ve been down this road. By the time I was scoping out psychologists, I had more knowledge. The OCD workbooks I’d read suggested interviewing them, ensuring you’re getting the cream of the crop. I couldn’t seem to find much cream specializing in OCD.

I ended up going with the psychologist whose notes I had scribbled on a tissue after running out of paper. Could this have been a premonition for tears to be shed in his office?

I mailed him supplementary literature from my trusty OCD workbooks to ensure he was prepared. I drafted a letter explaining that I was ready to do exposures, that I was hoping he would be my co-pilot, quite literally. We’d take my vehicle and venture onto the pothole ridden roads. But when it came time for this, the letter I had written felt bogus. I wasn’t ready. It was clear that exposures were the answer. I had entered into therapy claiming we would be on the road together. But the road was left untraveled.

Option 4: Skype Therapy

As time went by, my willingness for treatment would wax and wane. I searched for creative ways to obtain therapy and experimented with a few OCD specialists (finally!) from the United States via Skype. But help with funding for the service was not a possibility. And when the Canadian dollar is so low (so, almost always), fees ranging from $125 and upwards of $200, are more like $180 through $240.

So you have to be ready. That’s what’s tough. With fees that drain your pockets, commitment is crucial. I terminated treatment several times before I could commit.

If you’re from a different Canadian city, your menu of treatment options may look entirely different. This is unfortunate. Navigating my city’s menu has taken time, energy and has involved a fair share of frustration. When you need specialized help, ideally there would be a “no wrong door” policy so that wherever you end up, you’ll be guided to the proper help.

Regardless, I recommend patience. Sometimes the government works in your favour. I learned of a free ERP-based group therapy program from the hospital. Now I was getting somewhere.

The group gave me the jump start I needed. It also made me realize that because I was finally doing exposures, I was ready for personalized help. For me, this was important. I’m currently doing therapy Skype style with a specialist in the United States. I’ve found a good fit and it’s worth the investment for my well-being.

What about psychiatric care and medication?

For medication, just because it’s Canada doesn’t mean medication is free. It’s not. It’s expensive. You either need benefits through your employer, spouse or parents to cover a chunk of the cost. Or, if you’re on disability assistance, your medication will be covered. People can also apply for special funding programs if they meet the eligibility criteria.

As for psychiatrists, they are free! But the catch is the wait. If you take the OCD group at the local hospital, you have access to a free consultation with a psychiatrist. This is a start. Otherwise, you may be waiting as long as a year if not more.

A creative loophole (if you have a family doctor, which can be a wait in and of itself) is to request a videoconference with a psychiatrist from a different city. This can often be scheduled in a much shorter amount of time. The psychiatrist can then complete an assessment and provide the doctor with a detailed guide of how to assist the patient through the trial and error process that so often accompanies finding the right psychiatric medication.

You’ve now been given a sample Canadian menu for OCD treatment. My hope for everyone, regardless of where they are from, is that one day someone will bring the menu to us, with more affordable options, and that it won’t feel like we’re playing a game of Where’s Waldo.

 

‘Twas an OCD Night Before Christmas”: A Christmas Poem

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By Melanie and Brandon Lefebvre
‘Twas the night before Christmas,
when all in my head,
The thoughts they were stirring,
while I lay in my bed.

The stockings weren’t hung,
by the chimney with care,
To ensure that both cats,
come morning were there.

The kitties were nestled,
all snug on the bed,
While visions of death,
danced in my head.

With Clive all curled up,
and Doug on my lap,
I had trouble settling in,
for a long winter’s nap.

While up in my mind,
the thoughts wouldn’t scatter,
The doubt and the fear,
just went pitter patter.

I ran down the stairs,
in a midnight mad dash.
The compulsion to check,
had spread like a rash.

Had I put them away?
I just had to know.
Could they be on the mantle,
just left out for show?

Approaching the chimney,
it soon became clear.
My OCD fooled me,
I succumbed to the fear.

The stockings were stored,
yet again I’d been tricked.
And doubting my actions,
had made me feel sick.

I returned to my bed,
all ridden with shame,
When checking you know,
OCD is to blame.

Now down again, up again,
Checking left me unsure,
With all of this doubt,
I hoped for a cure.

OCD was convincing,
of that I won’t lie.
I’d grown tired of fearing,
that my cats could die.

Maybe come morning,
it was time for a call,
To get peace from a therapist,
once and for all.

Special thanks to my husband and the poem “A Visit from St. Nicholas” by Clement Clarke Moore (1823). Following the poem’s format was a fun way to spread OCD awareness together.

Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!

Melanie, Brandon, Clive and Doug

Advice From an OCD Sufferer: How I Controlled My Harming Obsessions

My advice to those having fears of harming themselves or fears of harming others, and OCD thoughts in general, is: you can outsmart the OCD.

Your creative mind is picking the worst possible things you imagine doing, producing high levels of anxiety.  Rituals that follow, i.e. checking, reassurance seeking etc., are what you are doing to reduce the anxiety. The urges you feel to complete the rituals is incredibly strong. However, as I’m sure you have experienced, rituals are time consuming, can take away life enjoyment, and can feel very overwhelming and annoying. Know that you are definitely not alone with your thoughts and rituals, and that OCD need not take over your life.

Know that having these thoughts does not mean you are crazy, and it does not mean you will act on these thoughts.  As someone that has OCD, I know that the amount of doubt OCD brings can make it feel impossible to trust yourself and know for sure that you will not act on your thoughts. I want you to imagine believing in yourself again, and all the ways that it will positively impact your life. I want you to picture having the thoughts that cause your anxiety levels to shoot up through the sky, no longer producing anxiety. This is entirely possible.  As you trust your mind and body more, the trust in yourself will build.

One of the things behavior therapy has taught me is the power of the brain. The mind is a brilliant thing and takes care of many processes without you having to constantly monitor, check, or seek reassurance.  You don’t constantly have to worry if you are hurting yourself or others. I always felt like I had to watch myself to make sure I didn’t do anything wrong, so this was a hard thing to accept. The fact is, this won’t happen overnight. It takes hard work, but you can build trust in yourself. I was highly suspicious of this at first, and felt that I would have to live with my fears forever. However, exposure therapy continues to build my trust in myself, and allow me to face my fears.

No matter how depressed you feel, know that changing your behavior can change your thoughts. Resisting exposures and trusting your mind and body takes time, but can make living with OCD manageable. You can enjoy life again in ways that you never imagined possible. The power of medication and therapy available to OCD patients today is truly amazing compared to where it has been in the past.

Know that your OCD does not make you a damaged individual and is not something you have to be ashamed of. I didn’t believe this just a few short months ago. However, I now realize that the words ‘happiness’ and ‘I have OCD’ can coexist in the same sentence.

A Former OCD Sufferer Gives Hope and Support to a Current Sufferer

An OCD sufferer who has successfully gone through the recovery process and an OCD sufferer who is currently struggling talked about their experiences with OCD and social anxiety. Here is some of their conversation:

Current OCD sufferer: I have OCD and social anxiety and a little bit of depression. I feel like it’s harder for me to make friends just because of the social anxiety and it sometimes gets lonely. For the OCD I worry about harming other people. Specifically, when I’m in my car driving and worry about hitting other people in my car. And then harming other people in general like if I brush up against someone or also doing something sexually bad. So it’s a wide range, but that’s a little bit of me. Do you have any advice for going through the exposures? I’m just trying to do one of playing the recording for an hour a day. And I’m sure you’ve went through that and it’s probably hard in the beginning.

Former OCD sufferer: It’s really hard to first kind of say out loud anything because the first thing you want to do is not think about it. But that’s actually what makes it worse. What I think is by not facing it and trying to not think about it would make me think about it more. So I think a lot of it was just talking about it and saying it out loud and knowing that it wasn’t me. It wasn’t something that I was actually going to do. The fact that it really bothered me to even think about it, the more I thought about it I was like, “well if I’m really worried about doing this, I wouldn’t be worried about it, I would just be doing it.” People who worry about doing things, they just do it. There’s no conscious behind it – it’s just something they act on. Do you know what I mean?

Current OCD sufferer: Yes. I think the OCD thoughts, like you were saying, now I know it’s not me and that I’m not actually going to do whatever thoughts go through my head. A lot of the things I would do involved checking or asking for reassurance. So I’m trying not to do that as much. I feel like it’s pretty hard, but hopefully it will pay off.

Former OCD sufferer: It will. I’ve gotten so much better and it’s a huge relief because it was the hardest time in my life. The OCD to me was worse than my social anxiety, but my social anxiety – I still have issues with that. It’s an ongoing thing with my social anxiety and it’s something that I’ll probably have for a while. I’m just trying to really get out there and talk to more people because honestly what really helps is having people to talk to. Because when you’re alone – that’s when it’s worse for me. If I’m alone and if I don’t talk to people, and if I don’t reach out and try to communicate with other people I start to get depressed and then my OCD will start to act up, and my social anxiety. Because you’re just alone.

Current OCD sufferer: And do you find it’s worse when you’re working? Or is it better when your mind is busy focusing on what you have to do?

Former OCD sufferer: It is so much better when I am around people and my mind is busy and when I’m busy. The worst time for me would be when I was alone at night. That’s when my mind was open to think of everything. And if I had a change in schedule, change would bring on my OCD more, and if I was more tired that would bring on my social anxiety and OCD. I noticed if I’m more refreshed, if I sleep enough, and eating well, healthy, that I hear can help with mood as well.  It’s really hard. Your mind is a powerful thing. It will make you think things, and make you think that you’re going to do things, and you can really start believing. I was really believing that I was very capable of doing everything I thought. And to just know that I’m not the only one who thinks that, I’m not the only one who has had thoughts. And even talking to other people with OCD, it’s still like “I don’t want them to think that I’m actually really going to do this because their problem is a little different from my problem.”

A Mother’s Inspiring Victory Over OCD

I have had OCD to some degree for most of my life. Over the years it has shown up in different ways, but it has always been there. For the most part, I am now able to live with it quite easily and successfully, but it hasn’t always been that way.

My OCD was probably the worst when I had my first child. Continue reading